Window Panes
A short story by Audra K. Roslani

She lay on her bed, O Mio Babbino Caro played softly in the background. Her crown was to the window while the soft sunshine streamed in on that drizzly afternoon, the soft breeze lifting her hair ever so slightly off the pillow. The smell of fresh rain on green grass filled the room. Everything felt so clean, so new, the muddy footprints on the pavement below washed away with the last raindrop. She closed her eyes - the book in her right hand, her glasses in her left and on her chest.

Slowly she felt her thoughts, her memories, drained… drifting away from her honey blonde streaks, extending into long, silvery wisps that gradually formed into playful miniature Qi-lins. Tussling and intertwining, they made their way to the open windows and here, they played awhile more. Little by little and almost naively, they ventured further - chasing through the trees, oblivious to the world around them. Further up they went, exploring branch by branch, hide and seek. Higher and higher up into the sky they played, until they could be seen no longer.

Her cheeks were wet. She breathed in and smiled, eyes still closed and turned her head to her pillow.


Maybe they would visit her again.

Raya di Perantauan.. (23/10/2006)

Maaf Zahir & Batin to all and to all Selamat Hari Raya! I had a rather enjoyable Raya this year despite the fact that I'm NOT in KL ripleys believe it or not. Was terribly homesick the week before due to a number of reasons known and unknown to me but I'm all good now. Spent the morning of Eid stuck in a three-hour French class learning the mundane je fais, tu fais, il fait, nous faisons, vous faites and ils font. tres bien. Went to class in my kebaya top with jeans and no one said a word can you believe it? I tell you these matsalleh women, CANNOT give compliments one. grr.

anyway, unfazed by this i went back to my room and then went knocking on some of my more familiar neighbours and offered them biskut that I bought from Tesco the previous day (hey they were like realllly nice chocolate covered biscuits to replace the mama-kerrys of Raya ok) to do my bit in spreading the joy of Raya around Gubbay Hall.

Dewi and Hafzy picked me and Hana up at noon, and we made our way to the High Commisioner's Open House somewhere near Hendon. his house is so nice, it has the nicest garden. they greeted us at the entrance, there was foooood...oh yum..the rendang? c'est bien! oohlala non, tres bien! met up with a lot of Dewi's tarian friends whom I've met on my previous trip to la Londres, they want me to join the troupe so we can all perform in Oslo and you know what.. by golly I'm so tempted, I just might do it! also bumped into Farahana and her mother who engaged me into what felt like the longest conversation of my life, but she is a nice lady and lucky Farah got her momma to visit her - I want my mummy too : (

the tarian girls, they're all so pretty and smart AND on the singles market (except for the one in red!!!) - like i needed the extra competition!

my lovely sister and my giant wife.

surprise surprise! guess who i bumped into!

i've got bigggg hands!

Afterwards, Hana and I took the tube to Oxford St for coffee and a dose of Topshop. To make a longggg story short, we somehow ended up in Mawar for their open house (and supposedly to meet Ili there as well) but all the food was gone by then! so we headed back to Selfridges at about 6pmish - I bought myself a vintage Paul's Boutique handbag with the duit raya my sister gave me coz you know, I was depressed and it was raya, and I didn't have a new outfit..or a new hairjob..so yeah. Felt guilty about the splurge at first, but when I look at the pony and I feel so happy and it kinda made my day actually : ) small price to pay for instant gratification eh? I know, I know.. I shouldn't have to justify myself - I FUCKIN' DESERVE IT! After Selfridges, Hana and I went to Trafalgar Square for a late night walk and to take some glorious night shots of the city.

my little pony and friendsss

balik kampung naik bas bawak baju dalam beg plastik kuning tunggu kat bas stop tengah hujan

my wifey and @ selfridges

my late night raya walk at Trafalgar Square, tell me this ain't beautiful!

i no have sparklers, but i got city full of lights..that'll do!

we took the tube back from Covent Garden, got some hot chips doused in salt and vinegar, headed back to the halls, cooked ourselves a hearty pasta meal and watched an episode of Family Guy at her room. On the way back to mine, Diana was already outside my room and so we watched another episode of Family Guy in my room before I had to shoo her off to start doing some reading for today's class - Drama and Translation! exciting stuff. will blog more on that some other time. andddd after classes today, I went to Enfield to visit some of the other Malaysians in Middlesex for some Raya makaning...yum!

the nice people at Ted Lewis Hall : )

..and that about sums up my two days of Raya. not the greatest but I really don't feel as bad as I had expected to which is a good thing I guess. I do miss my mom a lot though. sigh. ah well..its 4am and i want to SLEEP! hope you guys had a good raya, i am missing everyone back home heaps : )

Homework

I’ve had a few questions about what my coursework is like, so this should give you a rough idea. I’m posting up bits from what I did in my Literature and its Translation class (which I’m rather proud of to be honest, did you really think I’d post it up if it was rubbish). For my first piece, I decided to start off small and relatively "simple"..simple being subjective here (and also because I'm not being graded for this) - the snippet of a dialogue between Hang Tuah and Gusti Putri – probably my favouritest Malay dialogue... EVER? I’ve left out the literal translation but do give it a go, its amazing the different results you get. I myself, am posting up my fourth draft here. The commentary is slightly rubbish as I put it together in like 15 minutes so please excuse that ; )

Foreword: This excerpt was taken from the movie Puteri Gunung Ledang (lit. Princess of Mount Ophir), a very famous Malay legend set in the late 15th century. A forbidden romance blossoms between Gusti Putri, a Javanese Hindu princess and Hang Tuah, a Malay Muslim warrior from Melaka – against a backdrop of war and mysticism.

Setapak melangkah

Dua langkah ingatan kanda kepada dinda



Adinda bersumpah jikalau kekanda tidak kembali

Adinda akan menyusul kekanda

Mengijab pada tanah yang sama

Bernafas pada udara yang sama

Belayar berbelok-belok

Sauh dibongkar ditempat tenang

Yang tinggal hati tak elok

Yang pergi hati tak senang

Bila sampai waktu kita akan bersama

Challenges:
i) Rhyming where it rhymed in the source poem and maintaining the meter and rhythm to catch the essence of the pantun.
ii) Coming up with a way to convey “kanda” and “adinda” most accurately in English, as the usage of "you" and "I" eliminated the mood set by the source text.



Solutions:

i) Playing around with the meter, and switching the order in a sentence

ii) Using the word “thou” to solve both of the problems mentioned above.

- “Thou” is the mostly archaic second person singular pronoun in English.

- Originally, “thou” was simply the singular counterpart to the plural pronoun “ye” descended from an ancient Indo-European root. (makes sense to use it in this context as Puteri Gunung Ledang has Indonesian roots).

-In imitation of the French practice, “thou” was later used to express familiarity, intimacy, or disrespect. (Expresses the terms “kanda” and “adinda” more accurately as compared to using “you” and “I”.

- After “thou” fell out of fashion, it was primarily retained in fixed rituals, so that it eventually came to connote formality and solemnity. (the language used in the pantun is Classic Malay – and as it is not used in daily conversations therefore this lends a feeling of formality to the text.)

And the result is:

For every step thy take,

Two steps closer, my thoughts of thee.

Thy swear that if thou should not return,

Thy will seek for thee,

Betrothed, the same earth as thou,

Breathing air that of the same as thou.

Sailing the waves,

In calm shores, anchored,

What is left, a heart that caves,

What is gone, a heart unsettled

The time will come when we shall be together.

- Audra K. Roslani

And there you have it! I know it’s not the best of translations but hey I’m working on it. It’s one of those things that comes to you just as you’re about to fall asleep and constantly needs reworking and lets bear in my mind, I’m not a literary person to start with so I’m only just getting the hang of it. So far so good I’m loving it! Note the rhyming bits I tried to follow as close as possible to the original, if you look at the physical shape of the translation as well, it's almost the same..yeahhh! Again, it’s my interpretation of the dialogue (and just bits of my explanation, can't be arsed to put the whole thing up) but I hope you guys enjoyed it all the same : )

Wings of Desire


ok watch this. ok. watch it. it's the one that City of Angels totally bastardized - i mean really Nicholas Cage? really?? and Meg Ryan palessssssssss in comparison to Solveig Dommartin's character by a mile. still it may be a little slow moving for some, but stick with it.. it really is a gem. please please if you ever come across it give it a go. and Peter Falk is in it. anything with Columbo you know is gonna be pretty damn good.


Marion: "All these people I've known, who are and always will be in my head. There's always a beginning and an end. It was too good. Outside at last, in the city... find out who I am, what I've become. Most of the time, I am too aware to be sad. I waited an eternity to hear a loving word. Then I went abroad. Someone who'd say 'I love you so much today', that would be so wonderful! ... Emptied out, inadequate. Fear, fear, fear. The look of a small animal lost in the woods. Who are you? I don't know anymore. But I do know that I won't be a trapeze artist. Unforeseen decisions in which to believe. I must not cry... I won't cry... no way! It happens, that's how it goes, not always as you wish it. Emptiness, emptiness..."

Random Day Out
after a rather dissapointing night of salsa lessons at the Trent Park Club House last night with Veron and her two Malaysian friends (AND after staying in the whole day), I woke up today with an itch to just get out of my room and out there! Went down to the bank to check on the status of my Connect Card and the guy tells me he'll call me when it's done (which he never did, the bastardo). So i thought i'd be random and have myself a little adventure. took the 121 bus to Wood Green (is a good half hour away) as i was told there was a shopping complex there. and that's what i did, i berjalan-jalan by my lonesome and wanted to buy everything but obviously didn't. after realising i had spent quite abit on nonsensical stuff, i decided to head back - not before tapauing halal lamb donner kebab to buka with. ah..meat. gotta love meat.

don't i look all gangsta. uh- huh. yea.

but don't tell Daddy..
i bought a pair of gorgeous, gorgeous Converse high-tops. i could not resist. just look at it! black and white print with coloured butterflies!! if someone had asked me to design a pair of Converse sneakers THIS would prolly be the end product. i love it to bits..who cares if i don't eat for a week! i'm sure we'll have mannny adventures together, my pretty! <3>

Baroque or Brrrroke (07 October 2006)
Veron and I giving our non-existent ballroom dancing skills a go at the beautiful baroquesque ballroom at the Victoria and Albert Museum : )

Part 1: The National Gallery, Chinatown and Victoria & Albert Museum (07 October 2006)

I rather last minutely pulled together a group of us for a day out in Central London to do the culture-vulture thing by going to the places mentioned above. Hana and I met up with Veron and Chesta at Oakwood Station, and i introduced them to my coursemate Stella whom we met up with at Southgate Station. our first stop was the National Gallery to see the Monet to Picasso Exhibition that was showing then (free naturally). I love it how there are so many museums with so many free exhibitions here in London, it's just great! there's never a shortage of things to do - you can even attend talks, film screenings if you want to, heck taking a walk and observing people and tourists alike is a past time in itself. one of these days i think i'll have a day out on my own and just soak it all in while the novelty's still there.

i absolutely loved the Monet to Picasso exhibition. one of my favourite's was the Boulevard de Clichy under Snow by Norbert Goeneutte. I love the effects of using a variation of the whites, black and deep reds..it's not so obvious in this picture but when you actually see the textures in real life you can't help but feel you're looking back in time, feel that the horse-driven carriage is moving.. i also loved how the trees lined up in the center reminded me of my night of mad-comical-drunken-stupor relief with Mandy that night on the way to Sacre Coeur from Montmartre...ah Paris, Je T'aime. oh btw has anyone seen that movie yet?? i'm dying to get my hands on the DVD!

'Le Boulevard de Clichy, par un temps de neige'

another one of my all time favourite impressionists - Hilaire-Germain-Edgar Degas was also showing. He's more known for his paintings of ballerina's, dancers and the sort and they had Miss La La at the Cirque Fernando on exhibit which thrilled me to bits!

Miss La La at the Cirque Fernando

And of course this National Gallery entry wouldn’t be complete if I didn’t post up a picture of Van Gogh’s Sunflowers. Like the Mona Lisa, seeing it up close you are able to appreciate the layers of paint and technique that went into producing it..but unlike the Mona Lisa – Sunflowers was actually more impressive in real life due to its size in relativity to dear Miss Mona.

Sunflowers by Vincent Van Gogh

Moving along, we did the touristy thing and took our token touristy pictures at Trafalgar Square with the infamous pigeons, I swear they look like scabs there were so many of them. Don’t you feel like just scratching them from the picture! Geli!!

Scabby pigeons. yuck!

Stella and Audra do National Gallery!

Shesta, Veron, Audra and Stella infront of the National Gallery

Audra does her scary geisha dance

We headed to China Town after for lunch and Stella was just grossed out seeing the roasted ducks hanging from the glass windows of the Chinese restaurants – something most Asians are just so accustomed to seeing in our everyday lives, which I found amusing. Stella decided to try the same thing as I had, Malaysian Ho Fun which was quite delicious to be honest but she found it a bit too spicy for her palate. Veron and I thought them how to use chopsticks, bubble tea and the beauty of ending every sentence with ‘lah’ and ‘man’. Hana is almost there mannn : )

Hana and her chopsticks!

Part 2: The National Gallery, Chinatown and Victoria & Albert Museum (07 October 2006)

After China Town, we got a bit lost but managed to find our way to the Victoria & Albert Museum which was most impressive! In a nutshell, I saw these gargantuan figures by Michaelangelo – his attention to the human body is just amazing from the veins to the muscles..WOW!, pieces of monuments from all over the world – one really wonders how they ship these things and how they get them into the museum..i felt like a midget. good place to go to if you want to check out Japanese, Chinese, Korean, Islamic, Hindu and Buddhist exhibits. the 60-70s Fashion Exhibition sponsored by Miss Selfridge was on at the time so decided to see what the fuss was about - was expecting a lot more to be honest!

he's a reaaal champion

how on earth did they ship this in, let alone fit it in the building?

hana thinks she'll look hot in the dress in the center

the Karl Lagerfield piano dress..i want!

getting inspired by the dummy. who the dummy?

zef this picture is for YOU you corset-loving woman!

oahhh heaathcliffee do come in for teahhh, oh dooooo!

We entered another section of the museum (can’t for the life of me remember what it was, the museum was closing and we were dead knackered by then) but it had some pretty cool 18th century European stuff. I finally saw a proper baroquesque room, that’s how my house is gonna look like man when I finally marry my oil and gas/shipping heir nanti. Yeahh. Yeahhh! : )

dance with me george!

does this dress make my bum look big?

After the V&A, I parted ways with my friends to meet up with Dewi, Hafzy and Dewi’s dancing group at the Holiday Villa in Bayswater for the buka puasa buffet. I had nasi lemak instead..been craving for that! Wasn’t all bad either. Stayed the night at Dewi’s and came back this afternoon. Ooh ok I’m loving it now. I tell myself to lap it up while I still can, essays are due in November haha. Good night and good luck everyone ; )

So you think you look like a celeb eh!

to which my mom would say, "ehh jangan perasan." ala what to do Ma, say it often enough it just might come true right! bahh humbug..when i groww up..i wanna look like Monica Belluci!! i wanna i wanna i wannaaa.